Trouble at Mcdonalds?

a young boy who was eating black twizzlers walked up to me at a mcdonalds where i was eating eggrolls and he began sptiing on my food! i was quite outraged so i summoned my king cobra who in return spit on the boy and killed him. his gruesome death ruined my appetite and i was not able to finish my eggroll. i succsesfully sued mcdonalds for having a dead boy ruin my appetite. i recieved 2.5 million dollars which i put in my pocket but then i rode down a water slide and all the money got wet and was destroyed, i then sued the waterpark for 3 million dollars, but i lost the trial and am 3 million dollars in debt. i applied for a job at mcdonalds to payoff my dues but they for some odd reason would not let me work their. so to conclude my story i ask thi question; does anyone no where i can find a genie who will grant me wishes and make my life better?